May 31: Brooch

Day 21

Today is my anniversary! I've been married exactly one year and it's been good. I may poke fun at my husband's hoarding tendencies in this blog from time to time, but it's actually one of his endearing qualities. I don't know what I'd do if he suddenly wanted to get rid of everything the way I am sometimes prone to do. He keeps me balanced.

I had a hard time picking out something to purge today, so I finally settled on a brooch. While I don't wear much jewelry now, I went through a phase in my life where I wore a lot of costume jewelry. I have several bedazzling brooches on my dresser and I've selected one for purging that I almost never wear. It's pretty, but it's not my thing anymore.

I couldn't get a focused picture of the brooch for whatever reason, so I went for the fuzziest picture I took, hoping it would look intentional.

Happy Anniversary Clint! I love you!

May 30: Bracelets and Bob Dole!

Day 20:

I had the day off yesterday, so the world was my oyster. Most of the time oysters contain some sort of gummy, grey tissue, but sometimes there's a pearl! Yesterday was a pearl day. I had read in the paper that Bob Dole was making his way through every county in Kansas to say "thank you" to his constituents for supporting him through his many years of public service. It just so happened that yesterday, Bob Dole was in Wakeeney, which is just fifteen minutes from where I live. Knowing that the crowd wouldn't be too huge in Wakeeney, I packed up Peter and away we went to the Western Electric Coop. Bob Dole is 90 years old and ran for president in 1996. I remember voting for him in my third grade mock election. It was a real treat to see him...I even got to talk to him for a minute. It's the first time I've ever met a person who was parodied on the Simpsons (right Sam? A Treehouse of Horror episode if I remember correctly!) It was an honor to meet Senator Dole and thank him for his service to his country!

Bob Dole, Me and Peter. Peter is wearing overalls.

So all this has nothing to do with my purge, I just wanted to write about it. Clint got so fed up with me talking about meeting Bob Dole that he finally told me to knock it off. (I think it's because I said "Wouldn't it be great if Peter has a dog one day and names it Bob Dole?)

Today's purge is a set of bracelets I received for my birthday in Jr. High. I've always loved these bracelets, but a couple have been lost and I never wear them anymore. If I wore them, I would keep them, but they mostly just gather dust on my dresser. I'm just not much of a jewelry person.

May 29: Dirty Socks???

Day 19

Today's purge is: a pile of Clint's dirty socks! (sort of)

Though these socks have been washed, I call them dirty because there are irreversible dirt stains on them. One of the socks looks like it's survived a wolf attack and hangs all bedgragled from Clint's leg when he wears it. Many of the other socks have holes in them. You might be thinking "Wouldn't holey, dirty, wolf-bitten socks count as a throw away item?" (see post "Rules of the Purge"). Yes. These socks are throw-aways, but I could not resist the temptation to show you the pile of exorcised socks. Clint did not have a problem with me purging these socks, but he when I asked him how he liked his new socks this morning, he didn't seem all that thrilled. I don't care. The new socks have to be better than his old one!

Since the socks cannot be counted, today's purge is actually a journal. I had written in a few pages of it, but didn't like that the pages are spiral bound. I tore out the pages I wrote in and tossed the journal in my rapidly growing purge pile!

May 28: Pottery

Day 18

Today's purge is a plate I purchased when I was in college. It is a hand thrown plate that was made a pottery student. Each year the pottery students in my school would hold a big sale of their work on the quad. My senior year, I decided to be cool and purchase a couple of items. I bought the plate and a lavender colored mug. The mug has long since disappeared, but I've been using the plate as a drip pan underneath an African violet. Now that I've repotted the violet in a proper container, I don't have much use for the plate. It's pretty, but I don't believe I will ever use the plate for anything. Since this purge is about eliminating excess, the plate has got to go.

I've been trying to persuade my husband to let me purge one of his beloved books: The Great Potato Cookbook. This cookbook is completely irrelevant to our lives, but when I suggested we purge the book, he said "I was just going to look through that today!" (It's been sitting - untouched - with my other cookbooks since the day he brought it home many months ago.) He did indeed pull out the cookbook and when I asked him about it later he said "I love that book."  It's now been sitting by our end table for the better part of a week and he is still adamant that we can't purge it. Did I mention that my husband doesn't normally cook anything beyond a frozen pizza or chimichanga? Any cooking out of this book would have to be done by me. I flipped through it the other day and all the recipes are circa 1980. Who wants boiled potatoes arranged to look like hard boiled eggs?

May 27: Pull-over

Day 17: May 27, 2014

Today I'm purging a clothing item. Undoubtedly, many of my purges will be clothes. I buy almost all of my clothes at thrift stores for about $1 an item, so if I only wear the item a couple of times I feel like I got my money's worth. I bought this Columbia pull-over just a couple of months ago. I bought it without trying it on, but thought it would be okay. I have a hard time passing up brands like Columbia, LL Bean or Eddie Bauer. The pull-over was too short in the sleeves, hard to pull on and off, and the elastic as the bottom was too harsh. Also, the color is not the best on me. Buying this pull-over was a mistake and I barely wore it, so I probably did not get my money's worth, but I hope to recoup the cost at a yard sale or consignment shop.

On another note, since this past weekend was Memorial Day weekend and the unofficial beginning of summer, my husband and I thought it would be a good time to bust out our grill. This was especially exciting since Clint just finished the patio off the back of our house and built me a picnic table for Mother's Day. We grilled both Sunday and Monday evening and it was awesome. Our patio faces a heavily wooded area with lots of birds and we just sat out enjoying the weather. Peter seemed to like it too. I LOVE my new patio, it's like having an extra room on the house!

Don't worry! Peter was only in the sun for a second!

May 26: Crayons

Day 16: May 26, 2014

I have always loved Crayola crayons. I love the green and yellow box. I love the waxy papers. I love the names of the colors. I especially love that crayon smell. I find a pack of fresh crayons hard to resist, which is why this purge will probably come as a surprise to those of you who know me well. Because I love Crayons I own the equivalent of ten boxes. I have one of the big Crayola "treasure chests" of crayons and a set of 64 crayons, so an extra box of 24 is just plain unnecessary. None of the crayons are broken and many of them are still sharp. I'm sure they'll make some little girl or boy very happy. I just hope they appreciate the cerulean blue, forest green and scarlet colors as much as I do.

May 25: Infant CPR

Day 15: May 25, 2014

My son was born eight weeks early and spent the first month of his life in the hospital. As a parent of a preemie baby, Clint and I were required to complete a checklist of things having to do with infant care. I watched an extra-long video on car seat safety, we learned all about colic and shaken-baby syndrome, we learned how to use a bulb syringe and we had a whole training session on our apnea monitor - which basically made me crazy. Perhaps the most useful part of this checklist was the requirement that Clint and I take an infant CPR class. Clint and I were the only two parents in our session and I honestly feel like we learned a lot of good things...especially what to do if a baby is choking. The night after I had Peter, before we went down to be with him in Wichita, the hospital in Hays gave us a "care package" of sorts, which was mostly full of infant care information. This care package included an infant CPR kit...complete with inflatable baby.

I was digging through Peter's closet and when I found the kit, my husband immediately said "Let's purge that s**t!" Does that seem uncouth? I heartily agreed. I might be more eager to keep the kit if we hadn't taken the course, but now the kit is just a sad reminder of those first scary hours in the hospital after Peter was airlifted to Wichita. So we'll say goodbye to the inflatable baby and hello to our healthy baby boy!

I'm smiling at Daddy. Check out that dimple!

May 24: Bottle Opener

Day 14: May 24, 2014

Today is overcast and humid, but I don't mind. When I lived in Missouri, I hated humidity because it made summer heat unbearable. Here in Western Kansas, however, the humidity is a welcome change from the 100 degree aridity. Humidity tricks our water deprived minds into thinking we've received some rain when really we're just sweating more. Like a mirage. Stupid desert. Stupid rain shadow. Stupid drought.

Anyway...I'm writing about the weather because today's purge doesn't have much of a back story or funny anecdote to go along with it. When I moved to Kansas almost two years ago (!) my sister cleaned out her kitchen and gave me a bunch of random stuff. Some of it I use all the time - like the purple, translucent Pyrex bowl - and some of it I never use - like the Captain Morgan bottle opener. I'm married to a man who keeps a bottle opener on his key chain and since most bottles have twist off caps, I rarely am in need of a separate device to open my adult beverages. Besides, I'm not a big fan of rum.

My husband is the hand model in today's post. I think he's excited to take a more active roll in this blog as this morning he was very eager to be in the picture.

May 23: Red Mist

Day 13: May 23, 2014

For whatever reason, my childcare situation this month has been absolute lunacy, with a different person taking care of Peter each week. This week my mom drove in from Missouri to take care of my son. Apparently she and he have been having a grand old time. It's really great of my mom to visit for the week as she has to drive eight hours to get here. The drive from Ellis, KS to St. James, MO is not exactly a pleasure-cruise. Kansas is a vast, dull state to drive through and Missouri traffic is the stuff of nightmares. Oftentimes when driving, my husband and I will listen to audiobooks to make the drive go by faster. A while ago, my mom had given me an audiobook called Red Mist. It was a long book to listen to, but extremely suspenseful and absorbing...perfect for a long drive. Ergo, today's purge. I gave my mom the audiobook to listen to on the drive home today. Thank you so much for taking care of us this week, Mom!

Bye-bye Grandma! Thanks for everything. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone your secrets:) I love you!

May 22: The Ugly Duckling

Day 12: May 22, 2014

The title of this post is misleading as I am not purging a beloved children's book. In reality, I am purging a duck-shaped bath mitten. Calling this mitten "ugly" is also a misnomer as what I actually mean is "terrifying." Now, I like ducks as much as the next person. In fact, I might actually like ducks more than the next person. (In college I raised 17 ducklings for a science project.) What's more, I think every baby's bath time should be duck-centric. Rubber duckies, ducky towels and ducky washcloths are all highly acceptable bath accessories for infants. However, I draw the line at a ducky mitten that looks like you might find it standing over you in the middle of the night with a knife in its paw (wing?). I would never put this mitten on my hand and use it to entertain my son unless I wanted him to develop a fear of ducks for the rest of his life....which I don't because ducks are lovely creatures.

Heeeere's Ducky! (see how he just popped out from behind the wall? He's out of control.)

Bye-bye Birdie!

May 21: Whisk

Day 11: May 21, 2014


Today's purge is a whisk. I keep all of my kitchen utensils in a ceramic pot on my counter. It's pretty overcrowded what with the spatulas, spoons, tongs and scissors all vying for space. I'm constantly cramming utensils in only to have them get all tangled up and then fall out when I try to extract just the one thing I need. It's like a game of pick-up-sticks. I have three whisks, two large and one small, so I'm purging one of the large whisks. Most of the time I just use a fork for whisking anyway.

It's very likely you'll be seeing more kitchen utensils in this purge as the year goes on!

May 20: Exercise Band

Day 10: May 20, 2013

When I was pregnant I faithfully did a Gabrielle Reece prenatal workout video. The different workouts involved an exercise ball, light weights and an exercise band. Gabrielle Reece is a Goliath. She's a professional athlete who is over six feet tall. She makes the exercises look like a breeze when they are actually more like a tornado. This was most especially evident in the band exercises. I hate doing band exercises. Every time it was time for the band portion of the work-outs, I'd have to mentally brace myself for the agony. Part of my problem might have been that my band was just a glorified rubber-band that is meant for pilates. Every arm curl made me feel like a T-Rex with tiny little arms that couldn't make it up to my shoulders.  The next time I'm pregnant, I'm going to invest in a deluxe exercise band with handles!

May 19: Clint's Contribution

Day 9: May 19, 2014

On Sunday night, my husband was rooting around in our closet when I heard him yell "I have something you can purge!" My heart started racing. Clint is a saver. When we moved into our house, he literally moved in every piece of homework he'd ever done. There were tubs of old homework in our basement. So when he made his announcement Sunday night, my mind was reeling. What could it be? I was hoping that his purge-worthy item was one of the six pairs of thermal long underwear he has on the shelf in our closet. No such luck. He triumphantly emerged from the closet with...an EMPTY bottle of Jack Daniels. I looked at him and said, "Didn't you read the rules of my purge project? I can't purge throw-away items! Why don't I just recycle the bottle?" He didn't even respond. He just headed back to the closet with the bottle. Then I said, "If I don't include this item in my purge, you're just going to keep it aren't you?" He said "Well, yeah!" (This is why I included "sanity" as one of the reasons for this project in my Purge Pledge.)

So, even though the item is now in the recycling bin, I have included the empty liquor bottle in the purge. I know I'm bending a rule, but it's better than having a dusty bottle in my closet for the next fifty years!

May 18: Receiving Blanket

Day 8: May 18, 2014

I had no idea that when I had a baby, I'd be gifted with so many blankets! I have about a dozen baby blankets of all shapes, sizes and materials. Before Peter was born, I bought a couple of receiving blankets at my local thrift shop and while I like receiving blankets for swaddling, the blankets I purchased are too small for swaddling and therefore are not very useful. I use one of these small blankets in Peter's car seat as a head-prop, but I've decided to purge the other one.

I don't think Peter will mind too much. He looks pretty comfy to me!

May 17: A Chair for My Mother

Day 7: May 17, 2014

One week in and going strong! Only 51 weeks to go...

Today's purge is a children's book: A Chair for My Mother by Vera Williams. I bought this book long before I had my son because I had fond memories of it as a featured Reading Rainbow story. The other day I was reading this book to my son and my husband started listening. As I was reading he suddenly exclaimed: "This is the saddest story I've ever heard!" And you know what? He's not too far from the truth. The book is about a little girl who lives with her mom and grandma. The mom works long, hard hours at a diner and her feet hurt when she gets home. However, the mom has no place to rest and put her feet up because their old apartment and furniture burned down! Therefore, the little girl and her mother are saving all their loose change to buy a comfy chair for the mom. The story does end with the mom getting a chair, and the story has a good message, but it's probably not a book I'd feel like reading on a regular basis.

I'll probably donate this book to the thrift store.

I was half-right about the Denise Austin tapes from yesterday. The aerobics VHS was gone by lunch, but the pilates tape wasn't gone till about 2 PM. At any rate, they're gone from my life forever!

May 16: Denise Austin VHS Tapes

Day 6: May, 16, 2014

I am a collector of at-home workouts. By and large, my collection consists of Richard Simmons, Mari Windsor and Denise Austin. While I cannot bear to purge myself of Richard Simmons' Sweatin' to the Oldies or Windsor Pilates, I am ready to say goodbye to two of my Denise Austin VHS tapes: Mat Pilates and Xtra Lite Beginners Aerobics (I may be able to do it, Denise, but I don't want to do it). I'm keeping Denise's kickboxing VHS in case I ever meet a villain in a back-alley.

I'm putting these bodacious VHS tapes on the library's free cart today and I'll bet you dollars to donuts they're gone by lunch.

On a lighter note, my siblings have been talking amongst themselves about whether or not I'll "regret" purging certain items. In fact, my brother's plan is to take all of my give-away items and then sell them back to me a premium once I'm in the throws of separation anxiety...all except the knitting needles, which he thinks would make good back scratchers.

FYI: the only way to comment on my blog is to have a google+ account.

May 15: Pumpkin Spice and Everything Nice

Day 5: May 15, 2014

Today I am purging a half-used pumpkin spice candle. It's been sitting in my kitchen windowsill holding up my cookbooks. I bought this candle when I was living in a basement apartment a little over a year ago. I had a disastrous experience cooking spaghetti and fried chicken which left my apartment reeking of a weird combination of smells. The pumpkin spice candle was meant to mask the aroma of the fried-chicken-gone-wrong. It worked for a while, but candles make me nervous and pumpkin spice can only be burned during one season of the year, so I think it's time to bid adieu to the one and only candle I own.

I can't decide whether to send this to the thrift store or save it for a yard sale. At any rate, it's on its way out!

May 14: Gift Bags

Day 4: May 14, 2014

I just had a baby and a birthday and that means gifts! I have a plethora of gift bags I've been keeping, but as I don't know anyone else having a baby, I have no occassion to reuse the bags. My storage area is overflowing, so I decided to cull a few of the bags. I do not consider these bags as "throw away" as I can package them together and sell them at a yard sale for a buck or two.

May 13: Relish Dish

Day 3: May 13, 2014

I'm a thrift store junky, which is probably the reason why I need to do this purge in the first place. I picked up this relish dish at a thrift shop not too long ago, thinking I'd have many occasions to serve trifectas of olives, tiny pickles and radishes. Guess what? "Relish" opportunities are few and far between. The dollar or so I paid for this relish dish is not worth the awkward storage (nothing stacks inside the dish, so it always has to be on it's own, away from other dishes). Needless to say, I do not "relish" this dish!

I'll be keeping this dish for a future yard sale, and I must say, I like the picture more than I like the dish!

May 12: Knitting Needles

Day 2: May 12, 2014

My purge for day 2 is my set of knitting needles. I learned to knit in my freshman year of college and never progressed beyond scarf-making. For years I've kept these needles, naively believing that I may take  up knitting again. Really, though, how many scarfs does one person need?

I'll be saving these needles as a yard sale item.

May 11: The Improbable Machine

Day 1: May 11, 2014

On my very first day of purging, I decided to purge one of my husband's books. The Improbable Machine is a book my husband brought home from the thrift store, read five pages of and abandoned. My husband has a hard time letting go of things, so I knew Mother's Day would be a good day to ask him to get rid of one of his books. It was an easy sell...he hated the book and was ready to part with it.

The Improbable Machine is headed back to the thrift shop!

Rules of the Purge

The Purge Pledge Rules:

1. Purged items may be given away or saved for a yardsale.
2. Purgable items may not come from preexisting piles of things that I plan to give away or sell.
3. "Throw away" items like damaged/stained cloths, worn out shoes and broken things, may not be selected for the purge.
4. The items may come from any family member in the house, but I must have the permission of that family member before purging the item.

The Pledge

Beginning on May 11, 2014 I pledge to purge one material item from my life every day for one year. The aim of this purge is to sacrifice possessions for the sake of simplicity, sanity and spiritual poverty.